The Controversial Westboro Baptist Church comes to Asheville

Westboro Baptist Church, the Topeka, Kansas based Independent Baptist church known for its extreme ideologies came to Asheville on June 12, 2012 to picket a course taught at The Cove.

First, let me give you some information about the church. The church is headed by Fred Phelps and consists primarily of members of his large family. In 2011, the church stated that it had about 40 members. The WBC is not affiliated with any known Baptist conventions or associations.

The church is widely described as a hate group. They are strongly against homosexuality. Some of the church’s protest activities include picketing funerals of American servicemen, desecrating the American flag, picketing funerals of celebrities and public events that are likely to get it media attention. The WBC pickets funerals of American servicemen because their “attitude towards what’s happening with the war is that the Lord is punishing this evil nation for abandoning all moral imperatives that are worth a dime.”  Phelps and his family picket approximately six locations every day. One of Westboro’s followers estimated that the church spends $250,000 a year on picketing!

Notice how young this kid is!

The church runs numerous web sites such as GodHatesFags.com, GodHatesAmerica.com and others expressing condemnation of homosexuality. The group maintains that God hates gays above all other kinds of “sinners” and that homosexuality should be a capital crime.
WBC came to Asheville to picket a course taught at The Cove. The Cove is Billy Graham’s Christian training center. The course that the WBC is against is the Rapid Response Team Training course in which volunteers are trained to go into disaster-stricken areas to spread the word of God.  The WBC nicknamed the course, “How to effectively lie to people about God for money.” This is what was stated on WBC’s website: “Anyone with any sense would not walk, but run away from anything associated with Billy Graham. The truth of God is not in that place. Graham preaches the doctrine of satan.”

I decided to go to the picket to see what it was all about. There were about a dozen WBC protestors waving signs, playing music, singing and making statements accusing Billy Graham of putting profits before preaching the gospel. The protestors used boomboxes to play popular rock and pop tunes, with the words altered to suit their message. There were about 20 counter-protestors. Among the counter-protestors was Tuesday Feral, a self-described gay Christian, who told reporters that Westboro distorts the Bible. “They’re presenting a very inaccurate picture of what Christianity is,” she said. “Their message is, God hates this, and God hates that. God hates everything.”

My thoughts:

Seeing the WBC protestors made me sick to my stomach. It is sad to see and hear people that are so filled with hate. It seemed as if they had all been brainwashed. It is sad to see parents teach their children hate. I couldn’t imagine being gay and being at the protest right across from the protestors. It would be so hurtful. I am in total support of gay rights. I have friends who are gay. In my opinion, I believe that you are born gay and that you are not able to become straight. Embrace who you are.

I don’t understand protesting. Are you actually making a difference? Do you think this is the best use of your time?

Counter-protestors:

The other side wasn't all about love...

It should be illegal to serve pregnant women alcohol

The other day Kyle and I toured the Highland Brewing Company. We noticed a woman who obviously looked as though she were pregnant. And yes, she was drinking beer…every sample and had a pint. This disturbed us. She had to know about fetal alcohol syndrome, right? We also wondered if it was illegal to serve alcohol to pregnant women.

Here is some information about Fetal Alcohol Syndrome if you don’t know about it. Fetal alcohol syndrome is growth, mental and physical problems that may occur in a baby when a mother drinks alcohol during pregnancy. Alcohol use appears to be most harmful during the first three months of pregnancy; however, drinking alcohol any time during pregnancy can be harmful. A baby with fetal alcohol syndrome may experience poor growth, decreased muscle tone and poor coordination, heart defects, delayed development and problems in thinking, speech, movement, or social skills, and problems with the face.

I did some research and found that according to law, a bartender is unable to refuse to serve a certain group of people, unless there is a reason for them not to, such as drunkenness. What this means is that, legally, a pregnant woman would be able to bring up a lawsuit against a bar if they made the decision to refuse serving her alcohol, based on discrimination.  

I would not serve alcohol to a pregnant woman even if it would get me fired. The baby can’t speak for itself and alcohol has negative effects on unborn babies.

There is a lot of controversy. We give service to mothers who feed their obese children fast food and let them buy violent video games for their kids, so why deny service to pregnant women? Some may argue that it would essentially reduce pregnant women to second-class citizens because we are denying them the basic constitutional rights. They may say it is not the waitress’s call to make. It’s not her body. It’s not her baby.

Many of us assume that women know the effects of alcohol on their baby. Unfortunately, there are some who do not. If a bar knowingly serves a pregnant woman alcohol without informing her that alcohol may have a devastating affect on her unborn baby, a pregnant woman very well may have a good lawsuit on her hands.

What do you think? Should it be illegal to serve alcohol to pregnant women?

Newborn Photography: Cashing in on new mothers=immoral

I believe I am a person with good morals. I want to make sure that what I am doing is right.

It seems like I always find major flaws in the jobs that I work. For example, I had a hard time calling people to subscribe to newspapers. We could not put their name on the Do Not Call list unless they specifically said those three words. I disliked bugging people. People were usually very annoyed because they had received several calls or were being called at undesirable times such as in the middle of dinner.

Today I went to an interview with Our365. I applied to be a newborn photographer at Mission Hospital in Asheville, North Carolina. I thought this job sounded interesting because I could gain more experience in photography especially if I wanted to become a professional photographer. I found out that as a newborn photographer you would go to rooms where women had given birth just 8-12 hours ago and try to sell photo packages. This is cold-calling. They haven’t requested you to come and are not expecting you. I think that this is very rude and annoying. The district manager didn’t seem to think so. No new parent is emotionally stable. They are overwhelmed. They are not going to be ready to get pictures taken when you come to their room. If I were a new Mom I would not appreciate having a stranger coming into my hospital room asking if they could take pictures of my baby. Also, their most expensive product is $279. That is insulting!!!

I have read some other reviews and here is what I found:

1.      Uses bullying sales tactics.

2.      Claims to sell sterling silver products that are really made of tin.

3.      They took unauthorized photos claiming they were for hospital use, when they were not.

4.      Some people received blurry pictures.

5.      Don’t refund or replace products.

6.      Cropped wrong.

7.      Misspelled names on baby announcement.

I told the district manager, Kelley Johnson that I was not interested in the job because of the 1 year commitment and the cold-calling aspect.

It is sad to hear that so many businesses are run immorally. It is also sad that it is all about the money. Why can’t they give a quality product?

I WILL NOT TAKE A JOB THAT IS IMMORAL JUST TO MAKE MONEY!!!

Amendment 1: North Carolina Same-Sex Marriage

It is a shame that this amendment passed. It will now be hard to be proud of living here. I am happy to say that I live in Buncombe County where they voted against the amendment.

The measure defines marriage in the state constitution as between one man and one woman, and bans any other types of “domestic legal unions” such as civil unions and domestic partnerships. Same-sex marriage is already illegal in the state of North Carolina. The measure, however, added the ban to the constitution.

I am in total support of same-sex marriage. Everyone should have equal rights.

This amendment will likely strip away many of the legal rights associated with domestic partnerships or legal unions, so this also affects straight, unmarried North Carolina couples. For example, unmarried parents could no longer have the same child custody and visitation rights as married parents.

Just 36 percent of voters answered correctly that it bans both same-sex marriage and domestic partnership. Clearly, voters need to do their research. They need to know what they are voting on. Furthermore, North Carolina law should not be so confusing. It is sort of voting on a double negative. A “yes” on the legislation means a “no” for same-sex unions. It shouldn’t be so confusing. Also, education is key. People should not be allowed to vote if they don’t fully understand what they are voting on.

3 Amazing Songs:)

The Worst Fast Food: What has our world come to?

1.       Burger King Bacon Sundae

Burger King recently unveiled this sundae at a Burger King in Nashville, TN! This sundae is believed to contain vanilla ice cream drizzled with chocolate and possibly caramel sauce. Bits of bacon are sprinkled on top with a strip of bacon for garnish.  In my opinion, this sounds absolutely disgusting!

2.       Denny’s Mac N’ Cheese Big Daddy Paddy Melt

This melt has twice the calories of a stick of butter! Mac N’ Cheese is stuffed between buttered, toasted bread with a ground beef patty. Sauce and melted cheddar cheese is also added. The sandwich has 1690 calories and 99 grams of fat, 36 of them saturated.

3.       Hot dog stuffed crust pizza available at Pizza Hut UK

4.       Domino’s Oreo Cookie Pizza

A thin crust of cookie layered in vanilla sauce, covered in cookie crumbles, with icing. It contains 32 grams of fat and 960 calories.

5.       Burger King Ultimate Breakfast Platter

This platter contains buttered eggs, fried potatoes, sausage, biscuit, and pancakes with syrup. It contains 1,310 calories, 72 grams of fat, and 2,490 mg of sodium.

6.       Sonic Ring Leader Loaded Burger Double Patty

This burger contains bacon strips, onion rings, half pound of beef, two slices of cheddar cheese, and a double slather of mayonnaise. It contains 1,660 calories, 120 grams of fat and 1,450 mg of sodium.

7.       Baskin-Robbins Fudge Brownie 31 Degrees Below (Large)

It contains 1,900 calories, 80 grams of fat, 1,350 mg of sodium, and 225 grams of sugar.

8.       Chili’s Texas Cheese Fries with Chili and Ranch

Cheese, chili and ranch are piled onto a heap of fries. It contains 2,120 calories, 144 grams of fat, and 5,920 mg of sodium.

Eating frequent fast food meals causes teens and young adults to gain more weight and face an increased risk of developing insulin resistance according to the results of a study funded by the National Heart,Lung, and Blood Institute(NHLBI) and published in the January 1, 2005 issue of The Lancet.

Do your body a favor and don't eat fast food!

Crazy times in Stowe, Vermont and our new adventure

Well, the winter season is about over. It has been a crazy winter here. The resort got about 210 inches of snow when they usually get 330 inches. We had a week where the weather was in the 70's and early 80's and that melted the snow very fast!

There were days when I thought skiing in crazy conditions was a joke. Some days were very, very windy. The three year olds would literally fall down or get swept away and hit other skiiers! There were days where the the slopes were a sheet of ice. I took some kids on a run that is usually very easy. However, on this particular day it was late in the season. The run was pretty icy. If they got out of control they would fly off the trail and hit solid ground or hit balls of ice. I did not take them on that run for the rest of the day. Of course, there were some amazing days as well. Around President's weekend, we got 5 feet of snow in 9 days! We had so much fun skiing through the powder and through the trees. The three year olds would get stuck! One of us would stay behind them so that we could pick them up.

Crazy and scary skiing times:

1. Child's ski falling off from the chair lift.
2. Kids sliding off the chair lift at the beginning of the ride because the public didn't help them on.
3. Kids not jumping off at the top and riding the chair lift back down.
4. Kids not keeping their ski tips up when getting off and end up doing a nose dive under the chair lift.
5. Three year olds crying the entire day.
6. Ice slide: They would slide down so fast and we would catch them.
7. Flying apple rides: If the kids were not into skiing we would take a ride on the gondola. It was called the flying red apple because the gondola is red.
8. Waiting at the bottom of the chairlift waiting for shuttlers or public to take our kids up.
9. Teaching 2 or more kids how to ski when they have never skiied before. (very tricky...trying to catch them as they come down because they can't do the wedge)
10. Having to carry kids down the headwall at the end of the season. The trail was about 4 feet wide and there were many rocks! The trail should have been closed.
11. One day I had a group of kids. Two of them were twins. One was a boy and one was a girl. They were the craziest, most annoying kids I have ever met in my life. I have met a lot of kids in my life...they were constantly talking, following me, very demanding, etc. The girl puked and it came out of her nose. We were playing uno which she had never played before. She said that she pukes when she plays new games and that was normal for her.
12. I heard a story about how a kid pulled down his pants and peed on the magic carpet!
13. Code brown and code yellow! Thankfully, I didn't have to change them.

I was an instructor for a program called Cubbusters. It was a season long program for three year olds. They came on Saturdays and Sundays. Most of them had never skiied before. We started them on the magic carpet. It was amazing to see their progression. By the end of the season we were taking them off of the gondola and through the trees!

The resort is officially closing on April 1st. I have one last day of work.

Kyle and I ushered at concerts and events at the performing arts center. These are the shows we worked: Cirque Shanghai, Anais Mitchell, Chris Davenport, Circo Comedio, Marc Cohn, Larry Miller, Danu, Celtic Crossroads and Second City.

I also worked in catering. There were some really cool events and there were some famous people. I catered a martini event where they would pour the drink through an ice sculpture. I worked at a wedding which was a lot of fun. They had a live band. I worked at an event that was hosted by Abigail Johnson. She is the president of Fidelity Investments and she is a billionaire. I worked an event where Bob Woodruff spoke. He is an ABC news journalist. He was in a coma after a bomb went off in Iraq. He miraculously survived.

Kyle and I are planning a trip to Montreal for a couple of days. We are moving out of our apartment on April 16th. We will then go on a road trip to Boston, NYC, Philadelphia and D.C. We plan on settling down in Asheville, NC if we like it there and if there are jobs there. If not we will probably find a place to live in Virginia or North Carolina.

Living in a tiny house

●The typical American home is around 2600 square feet.

 Tiny homes are living units under roughly 400 square feet. Many tiny homes are under 8 feet, 6 inches wide, so that they can be easily transported across roads and highways without special permits or traffic provisions. Most municipalities mandate that a permit is not required to put a building of less than 120 square feet on your property. You can purchase plans to build it yourself, order a kit, or buy it ready made and delivered to your site.

There has been an increase in popularity of tiny homes. There is something about them that makes them charming. They are modeled after some huts in India and are used as mini cabins for cross country skiing. There are a surprising number of options available.

1.       Tiny structure built from a used cargo shipping container

Benefits: rust-proof, water-proof, highly wind-resistant, bear-proof, fire-proof, and resistant to damage from downed trees. Shipping container homes are too tiny and air-tight to safely use indoor wood or propane heating. Prices start at $17,000.

2.       Tumbleweed Tiny House Company: Prices start at $16,000 if you built it yourself.

3.       Tiny Green Cabins: These cabins are made from organic certified material. They have welded steel frames. Customizations include solar panels and solar hot water heaters, allowing the homes to be taken entirely off the grid. Prices start at $14,999.

*Many of these homes include a toilet, shower, and sink. Most people use small propane heaters or electric space heaters. Some people use wood stoves but they tend to overheat such small spaces.

Benefits of tiny homes:

1.       Utility consumption: lower utility bill.

2.       Reduced maintenance: There’s less space and less stuff. Caring for it takes less time, effort and cost.

3.       Life simplification

4.       Self sufficiency

5.       Less impact on the environment

6.       Less initial cost

7.       Less insurance and taxes

Negatives of tiny homes:

1.       It is difficult to host visitors.

Things to consider:

1.       Your bed needs to be a loft, or a fold-away. Multi-purpose items are great.

2.       To build to code in most localities around the country, your structure requires two entries in case one is blocked during a fire. However, many floor plans and designs for tiny homes incorporate only a single entry.

3.       Make sure you love the person you are living with. There is little privacy and when there is tension there is not much room to blow off steam.

4.       It is important to consider what your needs are before designing your home.

Where can you park or build your tiny house?

Most people park their mobile tiny home on their own property or on their friend’s or relative’s property. Some people travel and move around from place to place. You can park them at campgrounds.

The Controversy of the Sister Wives

●Polygamy: translated literally in Late Greek as “often married”

●Polygamy is a marriage which includes more than two partners.

Polygamy was taught by leaders of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints for more than half of the 19^th century, and practiced publicly from 1852 to 1890. According to the church, “The standard doctrine of the church is monogamy, as it always has been, as indicated in The Book of Mormon (Jacob Chapter 2) The reason given in the The Book of Mormon for the practice of polygamy is by revelation from God in order to “raise up seed unto [God].” In 1862, the United States Congress passed the Morrill Act , which prohibited plural marriages in the territories and dis-incorporated the church. Today, over 14 million members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are strictly monogamist, and members who are known to practice polygamy are excommunicated. Even though polygamy is generally illegal in all 50 states, practitioners are almost never prosecuted unless there is evidence of abuse, statutory rape, welfare fraud, or tax evasion.

Criticisms:

1.       Plural marriages produce unhappiness in some wives.

2.       Critics of polygamy in the early LDS church claim that church leaders established the practice of polygamy to further their immoral desires for sexual gratification with multiple sexual partners.

3.       Critics of polygamy in the early LDS church claim that church leaders sometimes used polygamy to take advantage of young girls for immoral purposes.

4.       Critics of polygamy in the early LDS church claim that polygamy was used to justify marriage of close relatives that would otherwise be considered immoral.

Sister Wives is a television show documenting a polygamous family. The Brown family includes husband Kody and his 4 wives: Meri, Janelle, Christine, and Robyn. They have a combined 17 children. The show captures the intense dynamics surrounding a man juggling four wives while attempting to keep it a secret from the outside world. Brown has claimed his polygamist arrangement is legal because he is legally married only to one woman, and the other marriages are spiritual unions. The Browns belong to the Apostolic United Brethren Church. The Apostolic United Brethren Church is a polygamous Mormon fundamentalist church within the Latter Day Saint movement. The sect is not affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. As of 1998 there were approximately 10,000 members, most in Utah and Mexico.

Criticisms of Sister Wives:

1.       People criticize Kody Brown for opening himself and his family up to potential criminal prosecution by appearing in the series.

2.       Critics say that the show could give viewers who are unfamiliar with the LDS church the incorrect assumption that polygyny is accepted by the mainstream church.

Why I could not be a sister wife:

1.       Jealousy: I would feel like it would be a competition to win over my husband. I would always be comparing myself to the other wives.

2.       I would not be able to share my husband with other women. The Sister Wives only get to sleep with their husband every 4^th night.

3.       I would have self-esteem issues.

Why I don’t have a problem with The Browns:

1.       They are not following the stereotypes of a polygamous family. There are no child brides. There are no incestual relationships. The husband does not have power and control over his wives.

2.       The wives are able to do what they want. One is going back to school, one has a full-time job, one is a stay-at-home mom, and one is figuring out what she wants to do. They can also wear what they want.

3.       It seems like there is a lot of love in the family and if it works for them then that is great! It wouldn’t be something I would do, but I am not opposed to it.

Why I do have a problem with The Browns:

1.       They say they can support themselves and their kids financially and I hope that it true. I don’t understand how they can support all of the kids if 3 of the wives do not work.

2.       Each of the wives lives in their own house. I do not think all of the kids are getting enough attention from their father if he is only spending the night every 4^th night.

3.       I don’t understand why a man needs four wives.

4.       Their lifestyle may make it difficult for the kids. They may get made fun of at school.

5.       When Kody is taking on another wife he limits his love to the other women. Each wife does not get enough time with Kody.

6.       When Meri asks Kodi to acknowledge her feelings of jealousy, by considering how it might feel if she took on another lover, Kodi says, “it is something I am not comfortable imagining. The vulgarity of you with another man sickens me. It is against man and nature.” I don’t understand why it can’t go both ways. This double standard is sickening to me.

What are your thoughts?

Best and Worst Companies regarding social and environmental responsibility

Betterworldshopper.org

This website provides people with a reliable account of the social and environmental responsibility of every company on the planet. This work is based on a comprehensive database of over 1000 companies and utilizes more than 25 reliable sources of data to cover everything from the environment to human rights, community development to animal protection. Data is collected over the past 20 years from a wide range of nonprofit sources on the social and environmental responsibility of companies. This data is then organized in a massive database that matches companies with their brands, assigns weights to each piece of data, and calculates an overall responsibility score.

Companies receive an A if they are the social and environmental leaders in their category.

The 20 Best Companies:

Seventh Generation, Method, Organic Valley, Clif Bar, Aveda, Tom’s of Maine, Dr. Bronner’s, King Arthur Flour, Earthbound Farm, Dansko Footwear, Patagonia, Working Assets, New Belgium Brewing, Nancy’s Dairy and Soy, Endangered Species Chocolate, Honest Tea, Earth Friendly, Annie’s Naturals, Eden Foods, Ben & Jerry’s

The 20 Worst Companies:

Exxon Mobil, Kraft, Walmart, Chevron Texaco, General Electric, General Motors, Nestle, Pfizer, Citibank, AIG, Microsoft, Archer Daniels Midland, Verizon, Procter and Gamble, Ford, Dillard’s, Vanity Fair, United Airlines, Sears, Bank of America

Companies that received an A:

Baby Care: Seventh Generation, Aubrey Organics, gDiapers, Healthy Times, Peapods, Nubius Organics, Organic Baby, Tushies, Earth’s Best, Tender Care, Earth Mama

Banks: ShoreBank, University Bank, VanCity Credit Union, New Resource Bank, Chittenden, Wainwright, Albina Community, City First, Franklin

Beer: New Belgium, Wolaver’s, Sierra Nevada, Eel River, Butte Creek, Peak

Body Care: Druide, Preserve, Dr. Bronner’s, Tweezerman, Method, Tom’s of Maine, Aveda, Aubrey, Kiss My Face, EO, Auromere, EcoLips, Pangea, Body Shop, Lush, Dr. Hauschka, NOW

Cereal: Alvarado Street, Nature’s Path, Envirokidz, Barbara’s, Peace Cereal, Arrowhead Mills, Health Valley, Earth’s Best, Yogi

Chips: Barbara’s, Little Bear, Bearitos, Garden of Eatin’, Hain, Terra, Kettle Chips

Chocolate: Endangered Species, Rapunzel, Equal Exchange, AlterEco, Divine, Theo, Shaman, Terra Nostra, Sjaak’s, Sweet Earth, Green & Black’s, Dagoba

Cleaning: Seventh Generation, Oxo Brite, Earth Friendly, Method, Dr. Bronner’s,

Clothes: Patagonia, Autonomie, No Enemy, Hempys, Ecolution, Deva, Maggie’s Organics

Coffee: Thanksgiving, Café Humana, Equal Exchange

Computers: GreenDisk, HP, Compaq

Cosmetics: Aveda, Aubrey, EO, Zia, Body Shop, Colorganics, Kiss My Face, Pangea

Credit Cards: Salmon Nation, Working Assets, Brighter Planet

Dairy Alternatives: Organic Valley, Nancy’s, Stonyfield Farm, Wildwood, WholeSoy

Energy Bars: Clif, Luna, Alpsnack

Fruits and Vegetables: Earthbound Farm, Sunridge Farms

Juice: Organic Valley, Adina, Sambazon, Zola

Meat Alternatives: Amy’s, Fantastic Foods, Wildwood, Sunshine Burgers

Milk Alternatives: Straus family, Eden, Organic Valley, Silk

Office Supplies: HP, IBM

Retail Stores: Patagonia, IKEA, REI

Shoes: Ecolution, Blackspot, No Sweat, Teva, UGG, Earth Shoes, Birkenstock

Supermarkets: Whole Foods, Wild Oats, Trader Joe’s

8 tips to stick with your workout plan!

Many people make resolutions to work out and loss weight but very few stick with it. Instead of making a resolution, create a habit. Habits are long-term.

Tips:

1.       Make it the same time every day. I work out when I get home from work. I get dressed in my workout clothes, turn on the television which is usually Ellen and workout. I am working out 25 minutes for 6 days a week. Mornings are also a great time to work out. It only takes a couple of weeks for a routine to become ingrained.

2.       Start small and work your way up. Start by exercising 10 minutes every day. Add 5 minutes per week. If you start out too big your chances of staying with your workout routine are low.

3.       Do a variety of exercises. I combine pilates, yoga and weight lifting.

4.       Do workouts that are fun. I sometimes get DVD’s at the library such as pilates, yoga, zumba, etc. and follow along. Do what you like to do. If you are not having fun you will not stick with your workout routine.

5.       Watch television or listen to music while working out.

6.       Focus on one habit at a time. Don’t over commit. You will be overwhelmed. You will have a higher success rate if you stick to one habit at a time.

7.       Don’t expect results in a short amount of time. It is not realistic to lose 30 pounds in a month and get washboard abs. Be patient. Results will happen.

8.       Workout with friends or join a fitness class at your gym. Working out with friends is great because you can motivate each other and help each other stick to a routine.

My workout:

1.       50 jumping jacks

2.       50 crunches

3.       25 bicycle crunches

4.       15 pushups

5.       Pilates: I lie on my side and lift one leg up 15 times. I also do the bicycle 15 times.

6.       Yoga: I do the morning salutation 3 times. I also do some other poses such as the warrior stance and other balance stances.

7.       Lift weights: I combine squats and lifting weights.

8.       Running for 10 minutes: I run inside by running 4 paces forward and 4 paces backward.

It may be hard to stick with your workout routine because you may feel tired when the time comes to work out. Just think about why you want to work out. Usually by the end of a work out you feel energized and happy.

Good luck and have fun!

Stop coddling your kids!

I have been reading Bill Maher’s book, “New Rules.” It is absolutely hilarious and brutally honest. In the book there is an excerpt about how parents should stop coddling their children. Here is an excerpt:

“I’ve heard that now some schools have stopped grading papers with red ink because of complaints that a big, mean red X is too negative-why, a kid might even think he got that question wrong. Parents today are so fixated on protection, it’s amazing they ever got pregnant in the first place. A recent reality show called Supernanny placed an old-school, discipline-wielding nanny into a family where the mother can’t figure out that the reason she’s having a nervous breakdown is that she says things to her kids like, “Tyler, Mommy would really appreciate it if you didn’t throw rocks at me.”…Now, for those of you who are saying, “But Bill, you’re not a parent,” I say true, but I have one thing these parents apparently don’t: a brain. This is not rocket science, What should you do when Skylar won’t do his chores? How about using your size advantage? Make him!...parents these days act like they’re on a date with their children-trying to impress them, trying to buy their love, and never contradicting them or giving them a big red X when they’re wrong.”

I have worked with many children and you can always tell which ones always get their way at home. It makes our job a whole lot harder. Parents, please don’t always give your children what they want. It is okay to say no. You will make them into better people if you don’t always give them what they want. If you give them everything they want, they will walk all over you. They will not listen to you and they will cry when they don’t get something they want. Never bribe a child to do things. If they are misbehaving, don’t promise them candy if they start behaving correctly. They don’t deserve it. Yeah, you can reward them but only when they are behaving the right way. Here are some tips:

1.       Give them some independence.

2.       Don’t be their best friend. Parents are afraid that their kids won’t like them. Being a true parent means that sometimes you have to lay down the rules, and oftentimes your child won’t like that. Kids don’t need a best friend, they need an authority figure. Kids really do want structure and guidance.

3.       Don’t automatically take their side. Listen to the whole story and don’t get defensive when someone criticizes your child.

4.       Make them work for what they get. Don’t buy them everything they want. If you do that, you are conditioning them to the idea that if they whine, they’ll get what they want. Encourage your children to work for what they want.